Hello to all my readers. I know you are rockin’ all over the world. Shout-outs to members of the Greenland Defense Force. (Bundle up!) Also to the kind Royal Canadian Navy sailors who showed me around their frigate when they visited Portland, Oregon, for Fleet Week. (When I asked how fast this thing could go, one of them said, “We can get a real rooster tail going!”) And I can’t forget the soldiers, sailors, and airmen of NATO, since I will soon be at war with them. Watch out, NATO, I have most of my hair and I can do as many as one (1) chin-ups.

Here in the United States we are celebrating Martin Luther King, Jr., Day. There is no mail service. The banks are closed. And our homeland has been invaded by our own Homeland Security.

Donald Trump’s attempt to refight the American Civil War doesn’t seem like a good time for the trivia I deal out in this blog: Observations on writing, reports on birthday parties and New Year’s Eve outings, and photos of my corgis, one of whom is relaxed and asleep under my desk. I know this because a few minutes ago, Lucky reached his relaxation release point. Like the Greenland Defense Force, I am ready for noxious odors from bad actors. I lit my emergency three-wick candle. Flame on!

I can only hope that what I write in here gives you a break from what is going on out there.

On Sunday I will present the 8 Disadvantages About Writing and the 1 Reason You Should Ignore Them, as enumerated in Alice Mattison’s The Kite and the String. I’ll also bring you up to date on my book and my Word Purge.

On Monday I’ll introduce a new art feature, because I spent 45 minutes today with Jeff Goins’ Real Artists Don’t Starve and he says I should expand my portfolio. His examples include Michaelangelo, Dr. Dre, and John Lasseter, the director of Toy Story. (Right. I am just like them!) Then I’ll stick to that Sunday and Monday schedule.

Stay safe, everyone. Pray for peace. Donald Trump: Don’t disturb NATO. As your eloquent SecDef phrased it, fuck around and find out.

Optimized for Arctic warfare.